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    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/-ifs-therapy-autism-diagnosis</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-17</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding Yourself After Autism Diagnosis: How IFS Can Help - Make it stand out</image:title>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding Yourself After Autism Diagnosis: How IFS Can Help - Make it stand out</image:title>
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    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/internal-family-systems-for-avoidant-attachment</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-05</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding (and Healing) Avoidant Attachment with IFS - Make it stand out</image:title>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding (and Healing) Avoidant Attachment with IFS - Make it stand out</image:title>
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    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/drama-triangle-ifs-therapy-relationship-patterns</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-05</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - Breaking Free from the Drama Triangle: An IFS Perspective - Make it stand out</image:title>
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      <image:title>Articles - Breaking Free from the Drama Triangle: An IFS Perspective - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Articles - Breaking Free from the Drama Triangle: An IFS Perspective - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/body-image-ifs</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-05</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - Body Image and IFS: A Compassionate Approach to Healing - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Articles - Body Image and IFS: A Compassionate Approach to Healing - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Articles - Body Image and IFS: A Compassionate Approach to Healing - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/internal-family-systems-for-anxious-attachment</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-03-05</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding (and Healing) Anxious Attachment with IFS - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding (and Healing) Anxious Attachment with IFS - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/how-to-deal-with-inner-critic</loc>
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    <lastmod>2026-01-29</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - How to deal with your Inner Critic with IFS - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/8f941ccb-9ad3-4129-a038-d01ad93c1934/image+%284%29.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - How to deal with your Inner Critic with IFS - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/what-is-the-self-in-ifs-therapy</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/5dbfb458-96f4-4be1-9813-499084e164f3/image+%282%29.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - What is the “Self” in Internal Family Systems? - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>A short guide to understanding Self in IFS.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
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      <image:title>Articles - What is the “Self” in Internal Family Systems? - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/can-you-do-ifs-therapy-on-yourself-a-guide-to-self-led-parts-work</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/64739e45-1876-4678-9ea8-4cc68d8b1d73/file.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Can You Do IFS Therapy by Yourself? A Guide to Self-Led Parts Work - In this guide, you'll learn what IFS self-work looks like, which aspects of IFS you can safely practice alone, when professional support becomes essential. I’ll also provide practical tools you need to start building a relationship with your parts. What is IFS Therapy? Internal Family Systems (IFS) is an evidence-based psychotherapy model that views the mind as naturally divided into sub-personalities or "parts," each with its own perspective, feelings, and role. Developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, IFS therapy helps people heal by developing a relationship between their core Self and their various parts. To learn more about IFS therapy, read here.</image:title>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/7c13837d-5d38-4124-a126-997ee7b7aeea/unsplash-image-SgsYqDtAzPI.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Can You Do IFS Therapy by Yourself? A Guide to Self-Led Parts Work - What You CAN Do Independently (And Why It's Valuable) Here are the specific IFS practices that work beautifully solo. Daily Parts Check-Ins What it is: 5-10 minutes of tuning into your internal system and asking: "Who's here today? What do you need me to know?" Why it's valuable on its own: Builds daily awareness before problems escalate Catches parts early when they're easier to work with Creates a rhythm and routine your parts can count on Prevents the buildup of unaddressed emotions Develops your "parts radar" so you notice activation quickly How to do it: Sit quietly and take a few breaths. Ask: "Who wants my attention today?" Notice what arises—a feeling, thought, or body sensation. Ask that part: "What do you want me to know?" Listen and acknowledge.</image:title>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/d3c7da3a-68be-42eb-b0b6-ef6259149aaa/Example+parts+map.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Can You Do IFS Therapy by Yourself? A Guide to Self-Led Parts Work - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>An example parts map from my free guide to IFS parts mapping.</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/25015156-27aa-4202-8508-273cb0119a24/unsplash-image-lJw1bptCJYk.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Can You Do IFS Therapy by Yourself? A Guide to Self-Led Parts Work - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
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      <image:title>Articles - Can You Do IFS Therapy by Yourself? A Guide to Self-Led Parts Work - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/torn-between-choices-ifs-therapy</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/5dcf1e01-175f-439d-bc51-c0e7c025e487/unsplash-image-TW_dKLcR8s4.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Why you feel torn between two choices and how IFS therapy helps - Why internal conflict appears during decision making</image:title>
      <image:caption>When you face a decision, two or more parts may speak up at once. One part may want change. It may feel hopeful or restless. Another part may worry about what could go wrong. When two or more parts disagree, the result is an inner tension and a feeling of being blocked or stuck. Many people describe this as feeling torn. You move toward one choice, then hesitate. You imagine the other choice, then lose confidence. The body usually reacts too. Tightness, shallow breathing, or a sense of pressure are common signs that something deeper needs attention. These signals often come from parts that have learned to protect you in their own ways. Understanding protector parts Protector parts are the parts of you that try to keep you safe. Some protectors push you forward. Others slow you down. They learned their roles earlier in life, often in situations where you had to cope, adapt, or stay alert. They are not trying to create conflict. They are trying to look after you. During decision making, protectors can take strong positions. One may insist you take action. Another may insist you wait. Without understanding them, it can feel like a battle. With understanding, the whole experience begins to soften.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Articles - Why you feel torn between two choices and how IFS therapy helps - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/6afc6e98-3a7b-48a7-8b6a-d6e175f687bb/ChatGPT+Image+Jan+4%2C+2026%2C+08_37_57+AM.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Why you feel torn between two choices and how IFS therapy helps - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/history-of-parts-work-before-ifs</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1762731103715-85MFC2D2I8SV89N712Y1/unsplash-image-zeH-ljawHtg.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - “Parts Work” Isn’t New. It is Ancient. - Philosophical Foundations The idea that we contain multitudes appears at the very beginning of Western philosophy. Plato, in the 4th century BCE, described the soul as having three distinct parts in his famous chariot metaphor: reason (the charioteer), spirit (one horse), and appetite (another horse). He understood that these aspects often conflict, pulling us in different directions, and that wisdom meant learning to coordinate them harmoniously. The Stoics of ancient Greece and Rome developed elaborate practices for dialoguing with different aspects of consciousness. Marcus Aurelius's Meditations is essentially a record of him reasoning with various parts of himself, including the part that wants comfort, the part that fears death, the part that judges others. They understood that we must speak to ourselves, not just think, to organise our inner multiplicity.</image:title>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/8c58a62a-8c19-4536-ad5c-abb1c933c8dd/lossy-page1-584px-ETH-BIB-Jung%2C_Carl_Gustav_%281875-1961%29-Portrait-Portr_14163_%28cropped%29.tif.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - “Parts Work” Isn’t New. It is Ancient. - Carl Jung went further, developing a sophisticated understanding of what he called "complexes." Jung observed that complexes behaved like "splinter psyches" (semi-autonomous entities with their own emotional charge, memories, and behavioural patterns). When activated, they could temporarily "possess" consciousness, determining how we perceive and respond to situations. His work with active imagination involved dialoguing directly with these aspects of the psyche, including personifying them, listening to them, allowing them to reveal their nature and needs.</image:title>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1762731748796-JBAECJLQIDRNNHOUL1SH/unsplash-image-raJrSL-LfVg.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - “Parts Work” Isn’t New. It is Ancient. - The Object Relations theorists of the mid-20th century added understanding about where parts come from. For example, W.R.D. Fairbairn proposed that we internalise our early relationships, particularly the difficult ones. When a parent is sometimes nurturing and sometimes critical, the child's psyche splits these experiences into separate "part-objects" (the good parent and the bad parent) which then become aspects of the internal world. These internalised others continue to operate within us, creating inner dialogue and conflict.</image:title>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1762736179060-FGAHQJV3EBHG6O3J3LGX/unsplash-image-V9qc-JVKIBo.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - “Parts Work” Isn’t New. It is Ancient. - Why does it matter that parts work predates IFS? When we understand that multiplicity has been recognised across therapeutic approaches, cultures and history, we touch something universal about human consciousness: we are multiple. So what does IFS add to this ancient, global lineage? Normalisation. IFS made multiplicity unambiguously healthy and universal. Not "some people have parts due to trauma," but "everyone has parts, and that's how minds work." This reframe alone has been profoundly healing for countless people who thought their inner multiplicity meant something was wrong with them. Clarity. IFS offers a model and clear starting point for understanding the inner world. Part of this model includes general patterns of parts (managers, firefighters, and exiles) that help organise what might otherwise feel like overwhelming inner chaos. Accessibility. By creating clear language and structured methodology, IFS made parts work accessible to therapists across theoretical orientations and to their clients.</image:title>
      <image:caption>What IFS gave us was a particularly clear, structured, and compassionate approach to timeless truth.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/healing-shame-with-ifs-therapy</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/547f0104-97a0-4bfc-ac3b-b3c3272ff4d6/unsplash-image-CCFCMb1Defk.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Understanding and Healing Shame Through IFS Therapy - Shame has a way of living in the shadows. It’s the part of us that makes our stomach turn when we think, “If anyone knew this about me…” Shame hides, yet it never really leaves.</image:title>
      <image:caption>From an IFS perspective, shame is a protector that learned long ago it had to keep us safe by keeping us small. Shame is doing its best to keep us safe, seen, and acceptable in a world that once felt dangerous or rejecting. Shame as a Watchful Protector Shame’s job isn’t to punish. It’s to prevent. It tries to stop us from being exposed, rejected, or humiliated the way we once were. When it rises, it’s often saying, “Please don’t let that happen again.” It sounds harsh because it’s desperate. It’s trying to control the risk of being hurt, even if that means turning against us.</image:caption>
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      <image:title>Articles - Understanding and Healing Shame Through IFS Therapy - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/mapping-your-parts-ifs</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-29</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Articles - Mapping Your Parts in IFS: How To Get Started - Parts Mapping: An Example Take someone who often finds themselves procrastinating on important tasks. On the surface, it may look like laziness, but when they slow down and begin mapping their parts, a fuller picture emerges: A Perfectionist part shows up first. It says: “This needs to be done perfectly, or it’s not worth doing at all.” This part carries the belief that mistakes equal failure. In response, a Fearful part appears. It whispers: “If you fail, people will see you as incompetent. Better not to try.” This part remembers times of criticism in the past and wants to protect against that pain. The pressure builds until a Distractor part steps in. It says: “This feels unbearable. Let’s scroll on the phone or binge a show instead.” Its role is to numb discomfort, even if it causes stress later. Watching all of this, a Critical part pipes up: “You’re wasting time again. What’s wrong with you?” Its harshness adds shame to the cycle.</image:title>
      <image:caption>I have developed a free IFS Parts Mapping guide- scroll down to access.</image:caption>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/ifs-for-limerence</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1758400296596-UYUGFRAZ76UCUYW2VL1N/unsplash-image-ofczR12zfxM.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Healing Limerence: How Internal Family Systems Can Help - What Limerance Is</image:title>
      <image:caption>A state of obsessive or intrusive thinking about another person, sometimes called the “limerent object”. A cycle of emotional highs (when you imagine or receive attention) and lows (when you don’t). A strong pull toward fantasy or idealisation, where the other person seems perfect or destined.</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1758400667594-OFWJ0C1ZG44ELU76EEJX/unsplash-image-SUm9yLyXmRU.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Healing Limerence: How Internal Family Systems Can Help - How IFS Therapy Helps Untangle Limerence</image:title>
      <image:caption>Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy views the mind as a system of parts. Each part carrying emotions, needs, and protective strategies. In limerence, several parts are often active at once: Longing parts may seek connection, approval, or the feeling of being chosen. Fantasy parts may protect you from loneliness by offering imagined closeness. Critical or shaming parts may scold you for feeling this way. Protective parts might numb or distract you when the intensity becomes overwhelming.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/how-ifs-heals-trauma</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1749946084311-Y3Q4C5F13HEN1CAWG1VO/unsplash-image-0gDfRhgmqDM.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - How IFS Helps Heal Trauma - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Trauma lives behind a protective door in your system. IFS treats that door, and the trauma sheltered behind it, with gentleness and compassion.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/inner-critic-ifs-therapy</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1750730057343-FTGMBVUT2B1L3KST3DDE/unsplash-image-TB4pI-8wPCs.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - When Your Inner Critic Sounds Like the Voice of Reason - That voice in your head isn’t always cruel. Sometimes, it sounds helpful.</image:title>
      <image:caption>Happy smiling woman with curly hair lounging on couch.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/self-sabotage-parts-work</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1749950667056-OSHM728B5ZPL88BQ7XSR/self-sabotage</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - How IFS Therapy Can Help You Stop Self-Sabotaging - What Is Self-Sabotage? (And Why Do We Do It?) Self-sabotage is when you engage in behaviours that undermine your own goals, values, or well-being. These behaviours (frustratingly) appear often right when you're on the verge of success or positive change.</image:title>
      <image:caption>Scenic shot of the beach with waves hitting the rocks.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1767003111189-Y2QA9N0PTSNAL82J7755/unsplash-image-bAk6aJSIohU.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - How IFS Therapy Can Help You Stop Self-Sabotaging - Traditional approaches to overcoming self-sabotage treat it as a problem to overcome through: Willpower ("Just stop doing it!") Accountability ("Get someone to hold you responsible!") Consequences ("Feel the pain until you stop!") Positive thinking ("Visualise success!") Habit change ("Replace bad habits with good ones!")</image:title>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1767003643171-I89I7CDM3DZNI5TMRJ39/unsplash-image-M0WbGFRTXqU.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - How IFS Therapy Can Help You Stop Self-Sabotaging - This protective - shame cycle is why willpower doesn't necessarily stop self-sabotage.  You're not fighting laziness; you're fighting a protective system that genuinely believes self-sabotage is keeping you alive.</image:title>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/how-to-explain-ifs-to-my-partner</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/458774d4-9507-4df6-b757-b07c454e39f8/IFS+therapy</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - How Do I Explain IFS to My Partner? - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/what-therapy-is-best-for-trauma</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/8e619797-9672-428a-9218-a2fe91488d68/unsplash-image-B-xb7VFtlZg.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - What Therapy is Best for Trauma?</image:title>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/trauma-informed-therapy-explained</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1750808183897-MWXC9KBQYBWZL5RQ2C3M/unsplash-image-5paRSKtn6rc.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - What Does ‘Trauma-Informed’ Mean? - Make it stand out</image:title>
      <image:caption>Trauma-informed therapy is gentle, collaborative and slow.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/setting-boundaries-with-ifs-therapy</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1767048877452-9YTPWFWTTHU84BE5F71D/unsplash-image-0W734ZoL9oE.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Setting Boundaries with Internal Family Systems - Most traditional boundary advice focuses on technique: "Just say no without explaining" "Practice assertiveness" "Don't JADE (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain)" "People will respect you more with boundaries" This advice is technically correct. And useless if parts of you genuinely believe that setting boundaries will result in: Abandonment Punishment and retaliation Being labeled selfish or difficult Losing love and connection Rejection</image:title>
      <image:caption>When parts believe boundaries = survival threat, assertiveness training will not override that fear.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1767049336544-QFP74B1E9XWY13SEF8XP/unsplash-image-NwD7kV4N4Pg.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - Setting Boundaries with Internal Family Systems</image:title>
      <image:caption>What Boundaries Trigger in Your System Understanding what happens internally when you attempt to set boundaries helps you work with (rather than against) your protective parts. Here is what may be happening with your parts:  1. You recognise a boundary is needed.  Self notices: "This doesn't feel good. I need to say no." 2. You consider setting it. You think about what you'll say, how you'll do it. 3. Protector parts activate immediately. The people-pleaser says: "Wait, they'll be so disappointed!" The guilt part says: "That's selfish. They need you." The caretaker says: But what if this hurts them?" 4. An exile gets triggered. Underneath the protectors, a young part feels: Terror of abandonment Shame about having needs Fear of retaliation Feeling that boundaries = loss 5. You cave or over-explain. The Protectors win. The boundary either doesn't get set, or it's set with so many apologies and justifications that it's barely a boundary at all. 6. You feel frustrated and powerless: "Why can't I do this? Everyone else can set boundaries!"</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/internal-family-systems-beginners</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-24</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/6847d56207320c72b0f32f39/1763857100060-F40BWJ7CVC2WAJN5WUBF/unsplash-image-DHR8LQRY-fU.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Articles - A Beginner’s Guide to Internal Family Systems Therapy - In this article we will look at what IFS therapy is, where it came from, and how it can support you if you are working on relationships, self worth, or big life decisions. What is Internal Family Systems therapy?</image:title>
      <image:caption>IFS therapy was developed by Dr Richard Schwartz in the 1980s after he noticed that clients spoke about “part of me wants X, part of me wants Y” in a very consistent way. Instead of trying to make those parts disappear, he became curious about them. Three key ideas sit at the heart of Internal Family Systems therapy: The mind is naturally multiple. You have many parts, each with its own opinions, memories, and strategies. Every part has a positive intention, even if its methods are painful. At your centre there is a Self with qualities like calm, curiosity, compassion, clarity, and confidence. Self is not a part, it is the leader. IFS therapy is often called “parts work,” but it is more than casual inner dialogue. It is a structured therapeutic model with a clear map of different kinds of parts and a stepwise process for helping them relax into healthier roles.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/tag/autism+therapy</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/tag/Is+IFS+trauma+informed%3F</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/tag/IFS+parts+mapping</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/tag/Trauma-informed+therapy</loc>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.anewchapter.com.au/blog/tag/Can+you+do+IFS+by+yourself</loc>
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  </url>
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  </url>
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  </url>
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  </url>
  <url>
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  </url>
  <url>
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  </url>
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  </url>
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